Have you heard of the five love languages? This is a framework developed by Gary Chapman to help us do better in ALL our relationships – romantic love relationships, family relationships, friend relationships, and even work relationships. Intrigued? I was very curious about this approach, and I can tell you it works. By figuring out the love language of those close to you, you can make them feel loved, appreciated, and seen. And by knowing your own love language, you can tell others how to better love and appreciate you.
The five love languages (in order of popularity) are: words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch, and receiving gifts. Words of affirmation are simply noticing what your partner is doing right and commenting on it – complements, encouragement, and professions of love all count. Quality time is time spent together just focused on each other, with minimal interruptions and distractions. Acts of service are the little things you do for your partner, like making dinner or cleaning the car. Physical touch is just what it sounds like – hugs, kisses, and so on. Receiving gifts is all about material gifts, physical representations of a relationship and love.
While some love languages are more popular than others, there are about the same amount of people who prefer each. So you can’t just assume someone’s love language is words of affirmation or quality time. It may be gifts, which is an entirely different sort of love language. This is where my latest quiz comes in. You can take it to determine your love language, and have someone in your life that you care about take it with you.
Check out What’s Your Love Language? to find out what your love language is. And don’t just stop there… have your loved ones take it too! I think love languages are such a powerful tool. Do you agree? Comment below with your love language result. Does it sound true for you?
Have you ever had a friend whose partner totally rubbed you the wrong way? Your friend was perfectly happy with their sweetie, but you could never imagine being with that person in a million years. I think we’ve all been there, and it just goes to show how we all have different relationship needs. And it’s a good thing too – or else we’d all be falling in love with the same people.
I had been thinking for a while that we all have different relationship needs. And despite what the old adage says, I don’t really think opposites attract. I have believed for a long time now that like attracts like, and there is mounting social psychology evidence backing me up on this. I couldn’t imagine being with someone who was that different than me, as far as personality characteristics go. Yes, a little variety can add spice, but when you’re talking about things like conscientiousness, optimism, openness to experience… I think we’re best off with those like us. Do you agree?
I felt like my own theories about attraction were recently confirmed when I stumbled upon The Helen Fisher test (featured in the book Why Him? Why Her?: Finding Real Love By Understanding Your Personality Type) which tells you why you fall for the people you fall for. It’s scientifically based and quite interesting. Of course, I like to put my own spin on these things, so I wrote my own test that was heavily influenced by the research Dr. Fisher did – with my own research and intuition added: Who Are You Looking For?
Please take Who Are You Looking For?, and let me know what you got on the quiz. Do you feel like your result is accurate? Have you already found a partner that fits the bill? I’m also curious… do you think opposites attract or that like attracts like?
I tend to believe that we fall for the same type of people over and over, even if we’re blind to our own patterns. Do you agree? Take my newest quiz: What’s Your Type? – and comment below to discuss the type you got.
Have you ever noticed that you fall back into the same old dynamics with your family? Even if you are a completely different person than you were five or ten years ago, it’s hard to change how your family sees you and how you interact with them. It’s tough to change who you are in your family without changing your family.
Families are complicated. You may still be trying to figure out how you fit in, and your role is probably always evolving a bit – but stable at its core. Some of us are the black sheep in our families, while others are the glue that holds everyone together. I think we all feel pretty stuck in our family roles at times, because they aren’t entirely up to us.
What if your name predicted something about your role in your family? That’s what my newest quiz, Who Are You in Your Family? is hoping to do.
It’s really simple. Go to the quiz, enter your name, and find out what your family role is. You may be surprised how accurate your result is!